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Dve blondinki si govorqt:
-Ti sno6ti gleda li TITANIK?
-Da.
-A koq 4ast ot filma nai-mnogo ti aresa?
-Onazi na koraba.

- Затворник 358! Защо никой не идва при вас на свиждане? Нямате ли роднини?
- Имам си, и то доста. Но те всички са тук.


-Може ли глупостта да се яви причина за развод?
-Може.Но по-често се явява причина за женитба.

-Тате,мисля,че учителката се е влюбила в теб!
-Защо мислиш така,сине?
-Отново те вика в училище!

Мъж гледа по телевизора прогнозата за времето:
-Еиии!!!Утре пак ще вали!
А жена му:
-Голям човек си вече,а още вярваш на прогнозата за времето!

На едно дете му дали едно левче.На другия ден то го изгубило и започнало да плаче.Случаен минувач го видяло и го попитало:
-Защо плачеш?
-Защото си изгубих левчето!!
-Спокйно!-успокоил го човека-недей да плачеш аз ще ти дам!
Но след като взело левчето то започнало да плаче още повече:
-Ееее!А сега защо плачеш?
-Защото ако не бях си загубил първото сега щях да имам две левчета!


БДЖ-БОЖЕ ДОКАРАЙ МЕ ЖИВ

Внучето обяснява на съседското дете:
-Като се напие дядо забравя кой ни управлява.
-А като изтрезнее,сеща ли се?
-Тогава пак започва да пие.

Един мотоциклетист кара бясно и както си карал ударил врабец. Съвеста го загризала, върнал се. Врабецът бил в безсъзнание, но жив. Сложил го в джоба, занесъл го в къщи, сложил го в клетка, налял му вода, натрошил трошички и си излязъл. След известно време врабецът идва в съзнание, огледал се и се разплакал:
- Ааа, решетки.. хляб..., вода... убил съм мотоциклетиста!

Намерил си веднъж гарванът парче сирене и кацнал на едно дърво. Видяла го лисицата и започнала да го замеря с камъни. Гарванът паднал от дървото, лисицата му ударила два шамара и му взела сиренето.
Когато се свестил гарванът си казал :
-Леле, колко са я променили тая басня!